I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Randomize
