omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
