oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Come back. Shots need mouths.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Randomize
