why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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