How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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