She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
