This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
