He is an equal opportunity slut.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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