Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
