The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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