"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
