She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
