you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
