I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
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