Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
