i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize