so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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