all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
