I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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