so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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