Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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