Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
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