You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
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