it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I currently don't understand fingers.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
