Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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