Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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