Already got asked if we're dating
My liver just broke up with me...
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
