doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
