do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize