ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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