is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
