He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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