Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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