I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
