they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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