P.S. I can't hear my feet
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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