I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
