Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
