playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
