I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Randomize
