brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
