take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize
