i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
