i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
