I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
