Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You are a genius and a whore.
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