The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
MIDGETS
????
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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