i don't like sucking hair
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
