I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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