Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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